Do you have a fundamental, constitutional, unlimited, and absolute right to be stupid? Reckless? Well, no, as it turns out, as reported in a recent Colorado Politics story. It seems a gentleman who worked for FedEx did not want to wear a mask at work during the pandemic. Oh, and he also denied that there was, in fact, a pandemic. The whole thing, he asserted, was a hoax and apparently nobody died (spoiler: he is wrong).

He based this non-fact-based point of view on a favorite Fox News commentator and a website, since shuttered, that ran a lot of conspiracy theory stories about lots of things. While apparently accepting that his employer was allowed to require that he wear, say, pants, this fellow argued that masks actually killed people and he wasn’t going to put up with any of that nonsense (and nonscience, but I digress…).

So, FedEx told him he could wear a mask, take a 30-day leave of absence, or be fired. He chose the 30-day option, but upon returning, again refused to wear the required mask. FedEx then fired him.

As is typical with these reality-challenged folks, the now former employee took to the courts arguing a slew of different legal principles to see which, metaphorically, would stick to the wall when the whole pile of nonsense was thrown against said wall. He argued that he had the right to make “medical” decisions for himself, and he argued that the Americans with Disabilities Act as well as the HIPPA law also made him above mask wearing.

Not surprisingly, the Court, which is required to be fact and reality based, found against the gent, finding that he didn’t really have a case under the law, plus he apparently forgot to sue Governor Polis, who had issued the emergency mask order in the first place. Sloppy.

Oh, and he also sued Whole Foods, because a security guard asked him to mask up when shopping, or leave the store, because, you know, hoax stuff. Whole Foods is currently fighting the case, and I’ll be pretty shocked if they don’t also win a dismissal.

Now, I’ve written many times about the notion that in our country we often find our rights seemingly in conflict with each other. Your right to, say, freedom of religion, does not extend to allowing you to sacrifice puppies in the name of your faith. Your freedom of speech does not allow you to yell fire in a crowded theater (unless, and this is important, the theater is actually on fire, then it’s fine to yell). The folks who make Off bug spray don’t get to claim the spray is also a bear repellant, and your right to own guns doesn’t mean you can have your own personal nuke. Way back when Oliver Wendell Holmes was on the US Supreme Court, he is credited with summing all that up by saying that, under the law, your right to swing your arm ends where my nose begins.

And during a pandemic, your nose becomes pretty important, especially if you are a vaccine denier who claims there was no pandemic. 

Way back in 1918, my grandparents were Iowa farmers and newlyweds, living on their farm outside a small town. Yet the pandemic of that year, oft called the “Spanish Flu,” sickened them both. There is no way of knowing, of course, by whom they specifically were sickened, but I’m guessing there wasn’t a mask involved. People didn’t know as much as they do today, and after the first wave, quite a few folks stopped wearing masks back then. Then things got bad again. Sound familiar?

In thinking about the former FedEx worker, I wondered whether there had been similar lawsuits back in the 1918 pandemic. As it turns out, a tiny handful actually made it to the Supreme Court, where that Court sided with the government on most of the issues involved, as today’s courts have also done. So, things aren’t looking good for the FedEx guy’s appeal.

But in reading the story, I was yet again reminded of the wisdom of Justice Holmes. The FedEx guy claimed he had a right to not mask up. Essentially, if you are not a science denier, that means he feels he has the right to spread the virus unfettered, because, you know, freedom. 

But he denies the science, which puts him in the same class as Mary Mallon, better known as “Typhoid Mary.” She was a cook who, while not ill herself, spread typhoid. She repeatedly denied reality and got herself hired as a cook for several families, a chunk of whom then died of typhoid. She was ultimately locked up for the rest of her life as she was intent on her own idea of “freedom,” that apparently included the right to infect and kill others.

We don’t know, of course, if the former FedEx guy currently carries the virus. Without the vaccine, he likely will, eventually. And I know you’ve seen the same news stories that I have, wherein a person deathly ill from COVID muses over having rejected the science and a dose of the vaccine. Perhaps then he’ll see that the whole thing isn’t a hoax.

Now, of course there are limits on what companies can require of workers. Heck, there has been quite a bit of case law on that very subject. Generally speaking, companies can’t make unreasonable demands on their workers, but of course, the word “unreasonable” is the key. During a global pandemic, even if denied, companies surely have the legal right to protect the health of both staff and the public. 

I have no doubt the gentleman will continue to shout about his perceived injustice at the top of his lungs. But only as long, of course, as he stays virus-free. I don’t like his odds.