New legislators aren’t the only ones going through orientation. Some of their spouses and partners also spent two days this week learning what their roles will, and won’t be, in the coming session.

Only a handful attended the spouses’ orientation sessions, but they told The Colorado Statesman they’re ready to support their partners and help keep them grounded.

Barb Neville is not new to the process, and she is in a unique position. Her husband, state Sen.-elect. Tim Neville, R-Littleton, served during the 2012 session as a replacement for then-Sen. Mike Kopp, R-Littleton, who resigned in October 2011. Barb Neville also is mom to Rep.-elect Patrick Neville, R-Castle Rock.

Barb Neville admits she is a political junkie — she ran for the state Senate in 2006 — but says she plans to focus on running the family insurance business. As to how she will keep her family grounded during the next session, “We’re all on the same level.” There may be times when they disagree about an issue, but for the most part the family thinks alike. “It doesn’t matter if it’s home, work or politics, everyone knows where the Nevilles stand.”

The Wednesday morning session featured a panel with spouses and partners of legislators. Richard Hodge, husband of Sen. Mary Hodge, D-Brighton, told the spouses that most people don’t know the difference between Denver and Washington, D.C.

That’s something that Rose Willett, wife of Rep.-elect Yeulin Willett, R-Grand Junction, hopes to work on in her community. “The campaigning was unique,” she said. “It was refreshing to see how passionate people are” about their community and that they want the best for that community.

But Rose Willett said she was a little disturbed about the lack of general knowledge that people have about the election process. She noted that some people thought once her husband won the primary, he was unopposed, that the election was over and that “he should be in Washington.” As a result, Willett said she has been talking to both Democrats and Republicans in the district to get them organized and more involved in the election process.

Keeping her husband grounded will be a family affair: three of the four Willett children are in college in the Denver area; the fourth is in college in Phoenix. They will play an important role in helping keep their dad grounded. “They’re good at that,” she said. “They’re not hesitant to let him know when he needs to rethink things.” Willett also will be in Denver from time to time to help with that process; she is a scholarship mentor at Colorado Mesa University and travels to Denver for meetings.

Kelly Dore, wife of Rep. Tim Dore, R-Elizabeth, spoke to the way family life changes during the legislative session. The Dores have four children, ranging from first to eighth grade and all are active in sports. District 64 encompasses nine counties, so managing family life takes careful planning. Kelly Dore said they make sure one parent is always at their children’s events. They also try to do a date night at least once a month during the session, and Rep. Dore goes to Mass every morning as a way to stay focused. “No one will ever fault you for putting your family first,” she said.

Kelly Van Winkle is a newlywed; her husband is Rep.-elect Kevin Van Winkle, R-Highlands Ranch, who went from years working for the Senate Republicans to becoming an elected representative. The Van Winkles have been married for 18 months.

“I’m probably more involved than I was in the past, going to events, and being by his side,” Kelly Van Winkle told The Statesman. “I’m excited. He’s done a great job of preparing me for what’s to come.” Kelly said they will rely on their faith and continue to go to church every Sunday to keep a sense of balance.

Spouses may be at times confronted by constituents in their communities, according to the panelists. “Your ‘say’ stays at home,” said Cheri Crowder, wife of Sen. Larry Crowder, R-Alamosa. Kelly Dore noted that the legislator will never make everyone happy, and that some people feel her husband is either too conservative or not conservative enough. “Don’t take it personally,” she said.

Communication is also a challenge during the session, and the panelists said their spouses rely primarily on texting to stay in touch with their families. But communication at home also will be part of the spouses’ jobs, and that might mean shutting off the tablet or cell phone. Cheri Crowder commented that the cell phones become their god, but when the phone goes off during dinner, she says “no.” When he’s home, and that’s every weekend, “that’s his time to regenerate.”

— Marianne@coloradostatesman.com