The lighter side of the state Capitol, usually.

This week, Capitol M is reminded of many an old Irish song as the General Assembly and everyone else who hangs there celebrated St. Patrick’s Day. 

FYI, the short version is St. Paddy’s Day, with a D, not a T. Don’t forget that.

As the song says, “Everybody’s Irish for a day.” And no truer words ever sung than on March 17.

That also included the ye old tradition of handing down the UGLIEST sports coat known to fashion, which is a puke-shade of green, not spring or shamrock green, which is the true Irish color. 

Tradition, which dates back all the way to 1974, requires whichever House lawmaker, who should be (but isn’t always) of Irish descent, to hand it off to a lawmaker of Irish descent from the other side of the aisle.

This year’s victim: Rep. Matt Gray of Broomfield. Gray reminded the House that they were not in session in 2020, due to COVID, so he has hung onto the coat a bit longer (although he did wear it with pride in 2021).

This sounded like a complaint. Capitol M thinks it’s more of an Irish blessing than a curse.

Gray announced the coat will go to someone else for 2023, which prompted Rep. Mike Lynch of Wellington to be the first to put in a bid. Note to Rep. Lynch: there are ALWAYS bribes involved. 

Gray also entertained (?) the chamber with a rendition of “When Irish Eyes are Smiling.” 

As to the wearing o’ the green itself, there are a lot of pretty good stories about what people were wearing on March 17.

The blindingly green coat Rep. Steven Woodrow of Denver started out as a coat he wore for his kids, tied to the game Clue (Mr. Green). 

The coat worn by Rep. Barbara McLachlan of Durango was temporarily borrowed from the extras of the House sergeants, the only people who look 100% natural in green, since they wear it every day.

Rep. Mary Young of Greeley, by the way, is nee McNamara, and inserted “Mc” into her last name many years ago when there were two Mary Youngs in something she was involved in. It’s also in one of her email addresses. 

Young and McLachlan are part of the “Mick” caucus that also includes Reps. Julie McCluskie of Dillon and Karen McCormick of Longmont.

Best dressed colleen among the lawmakers, in Capitol M’s judgment, is Sen. Faith Winter of Westminster, who really looked the part.

The wearing of the green extended to many lawmakers, but there was one who stood out among all, and it wasn’t for green.

Sen. John Cooke, a long-term Anglophile, was wearing an ORANGE tie and had a Union Jack on his desk. 

The orange relates in part to the Irish flag. Green is for Roman Catholics and for the Irish Republic. Orange is for Protestants and Northern Ireland. But orange also traditionally signifies obedience to the English crown. White, in the middle, is the peace between the two. So wearing orange on March 17 is a definite no-no, unless you intend to make a statement, and Cooke did.

Cooke’s was “Long live the Queen and may the sun never rest on the British Empire!”

Tsk-tsk.

Gov. Jared Polis, by the way, was NOT wearing green, but was “encouraged” to do so by Capitol M. His last-minute solution was a green marker.

Note to anyone who might point out that Capitol M’s last name could not be more English: the family ancestors lived in southern England, between Cornwall, which is one of the seven Irish nations, and Glastonbury, where Irish influence also reigned under the cult of St. Patrick. So, that’s where Capitol M’s Irish comes from. We think. (Plus there’s that harp thing.)

Hopefully the 7 blessings of the Irish graced you all this week, and remember – there are only two kinds of people in the world: the Irish, and those who wish they were. 

Finally, kudos to House Majority Leader Rep. Daneya Esgar, D-Pueblo and her accomplices in the House for this little gem, during the final vote on House Bill 1055. The reactions from Speaker Alec Garnett of Denver are priceless, and note how quickly he tried to get the vote going and end the discussion:

Finally, part two: the time-honored tradition of hazing new lawmakers surfaced in the Senate Agriculture and Natural Resources Committee.

During a hearing on House Bill 1022, which allows the Colorado State Fair to add industry exhibits, someone (Sen. Jerry Sonnenberg is a likely suspect) offered an amendment to move the state fair from Pueblo to Greeley.

Most folks don’t fall for it. But then there’s new Sen. Nick Hinrichsen of Pueblo, who got his first taste of legislative hijinks. 

The amendment PASSED unanimously, which is a first. Hinrichsen, the bill’s sponsor, allegedly got a little worked up about that. 

The committee then decided maybe that wasn’t a good idea and voted unanimously to reject it. Not sure how that follows legislative procedure. 

Note to Hinrichsen: get used to it. The joke around moving the state fair is a regular one, used to tease your predecessor, and on a very regular basis.