As bills begin to move from committees to debates in the House and Senate, some first-year lawmakers are learning about a time-honored tradition: hazing.

Not the type that has earned scorn in the military or in college Greek houses: these are practical jokes played by the more senior lawmakers in an effort to have a little fun without actual physical damage. It’s also an opportunity to build camaraderie, moments that are too few and far between in this COVID-19 legislative era.

Hazing isn’t only reserved for new lawmakers; it’s also extended to former lawmakers, especially members of the House who may have a less-than-stellar history with the Senate. 

On the agenda this week: The confirmation of former Speaker of the House Mark Ferrandino as the newest executive director of the Colorado Department of Revenue. To quote the late comedian Rodney Dangerfield, he got no respect, even from the governor’s lobbyist – David Oppenheim – who more or less advocated for his confirmation in a Feb. 17 Senate Finance Committee hearing.

Oppenheim noted that Ferrandino’s early career, somehow, was in the White House budget office in the Clinton administration. Ferrandino went on to later serve seven years in the Colorado House, including on the Joint Budget Committee and in his last two years, as Speaker of the House. Ferrandino’s most recent job was to manage 5,000 employees as chief financial officer and then as assistant superintendent for Denver Public Schools. He was appointed to Revenue in December.

One of Ferrandino’s biggest problems, it turned out, was that 13 members of the Senate served with him in the House, including three on Senate Finance.

“That was an impassioned introduction, Mr. Oppenheim. I’m not sure it convinced me,” said Committee Vice-Chair Jeff Bridges, D-Greenwood Village, one of those who did not serve with Ferrandino.

Hastily attempting to salvage his nomination, Ferrandino did a bit of groveling.

“I hope you don’t hold any of my previous comments about the lower [Senate] chamber against me, esteemed senators,” Ferrandino said (pouring it on pretty thick, doncha think?).

“That deserves more questions,” Bridges replied.

The vote wasn’t even close. It was 7-0 against. Added Sen. Ray Scott, R-Grand Junction, one of the 13 who served with Ferrandino in the House, “I’m sorry, Mr. Speaker, you brought so many bad memories back, I have to vote ‘No.’ “

Lundeen, having voted on the prevailing side, asked for a reconsideration, and the vote to recommend confirmation was 7-0.

It’s not very often you get to haze up, Lundeen said, then calling Ferrandino an eloquent leader for Denver Public Schools. “It’s a pleasure to work with you,” he said.

The harassment went into high gear on Monday as the Senate prepared to vote. Ferrandino’s nomination had been placed on the consent calendar (which requires no debate and a voice vote) by the Finance Committee, but that didn’t last long.

That change was led by Senate Majority Leader Steve Fenberg, D-Boulder. “Members, a very grave mistake was almost made this morning,” he told the Senate. “The enemy tried to enter this chamber as a Trojan horse, in the form of the executive director of the Department of Revenue,” his voice rising with righteous indignation at the end, and which got lots of harrumps and desk-thumping from the members. “I request that confirmation come off the consent calendar.”

Senate President Leroy Garcia, D-Pueblo (who also served with Ferrandino), pretended to skip over the confirmation vote and was on the verge of asking Fenberg to recess the Senate for the day.

Senators could be seen lining up for another round of potshots.

Sen. Dominick Moreno, D-Commerce City (who also served with Ferrandino), said such a Trojan horse could not be allowed to stand, and asked for a roll-call vote.

Sen. Jerry Sonnenberg, R-Sterling, another Ferrandino alumnus, said he didn’t know what to call Ferrandino “because he won’t stay in a job. Went to the House, served on JBC, then as Speaker, and then at DPS. Now he wants to do something else. Can this guy keep a job?”

Ferrandino alumnus Sen. Bob Gardner, R-Colorado Springs, recalled one of Ferrandino’s pledges during his time in the House, to never vote for license plate bills. “It’s appropriate that Ferrandino be appointed to Revenue where license plate fees are collected. He was true to his commitment the entire time he was in the General Assembly. If you want a tax collector, you want to have one like that.”

“I just instantly disliked him,” said Sen. Don Coram, R-Montrose, another Ferrandino alumnus.

When time came to vote, the fix was in. Only 13 members, all Democrats, voted to confirm, including two Ferrandino alumni. Almost everyone else passed, except for Moreno, who announced he would take a 17(c), a request that implies he had a personal interest in the vote, and which drew howls of laughter in the chamber.

The second round of voting finally got the nomination to a 35-0 vote, including a reversal of decision on the 17(c).

Tuesday, Capitol M asked Ferrandino if he had watched the proceedings, and he showed he has not learned his lesson.

He said he was touched to get the unanimous support of the Senate, and was glad to see that the Senate can have some fun. He added that he would have been disappointed if the senators didn’t hold him accountable for his comments about the lower chamber. Ferrandino said he was a little worried about going through a Senate confirmation, given those past remarks.

But he also added that he was “relieved that many of the Senate members were trained in the House for how to be an effective legislator.”

Capitol M dutifully reported the latest slight to the Senate leadership. Words were bandied about, like “subpoena” and “reconsideration” and “select committee.” 

Sadly, that same day, the Senate passed on a perfectly, tailor-made opportunity to haze two new lawmakers at the same time. 

The two were Sens. Chris Kolker, D-Centennial, and Cleave Simpson, R-Alamosa, who somehow had the bright idea to sponsor a bill together. For both, Senate Bill 19 was their first bill to make it to a final vote. The bill would allow county assessors to mail property owners a postcard with an abbreviated notice of property tax valuations instead of a more expensive and lengthy letter.

Capitol M was breathless with anticipation, waiting to see what practical jokes the Senate had in store. However, it was not to be. Apparently, the plan to harass Ferrandino, which took place later in the morning, was the main event, and the bill quietly passed on a 35-0 vote.