Colorado Politics

‘Progressive’ zealots bizarrely bludgeon Polis like yesterday’s fetus | CALDARA

Jon Caldara

“Bizarro World” was a set of comic books published by DC Comics in the early 1960s. It featured an alternative Earth where everything was, well, completely backward.

Earth in Bizarro World was called Htrae, (Earth spelled backward). Htrae wasn’t a round sphere. It was a cube.

Yes, Superman lived there, but he was evil. Aquaman couldn’t swim. People said goodnight in the morning. You get the idea.

I’m not as up on my DC Action Comics history as I should be, so I had to rely on Wikipedia for this crucial bit. In Htrae, society is ruled by the Bizarro Code which states: “Us do opposite of all Earthly things! Us hate beauty! Us love ugliness!”

Why this Bizarro prelude? Well, Colorado isn’t a cube, but it is referred to as a “square state.”

May I humbly submit, we live in Bizarro Colorado.

I know, I know – but stay with me on this one. It’s more than just the, “Us love ugliness” with crime. It’s how we accept upside-down thinking.

How could one come to any other conclusion after reading a story on abortion in The Gazette last week?

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A furor erupted from a bland statement uttered by Gov. Jared Polis. On a talking head show he said, “Democrats don’t believe abortion is good. We believe it’s bad. It should be minimized. How do you prevent unwanted pregnancies – to make sure people are empowered with the information they need.”

Perfectly. Sane. Statement.

Even abortion supporters prefer to see pregnancies avoided than terminated – at least on regular Earth.

But in Bizarro Colorado abortions aren’t bad. They’re downright good!

Even after signing all their pro-abortion legislation clarifying the unborn have absolutely no legal protection or rights and that abortion is wholly legal under all circumstances up until the moment of full and complete birth, Polis’s own lefty team members started treating him like yesterday’s fetus. They made Colorado the most abortion-friendly state in the union!

Still, the mouthpiece at the progressive hit squad New Era Colorado, Natasha Berwick, the group’s political director, expressed her wrath by saying, “We believe abortion is safe and good.”

Safe and good? Like mildly strenuous exercise and a high-fiber diet?

All medical procedures are, by definition, not safer than no medical procedure. Period. End of discussion.

Abortions may be relatively safe. But they are certainly not safer than not getting pregnant – except in Bizarro World.

And good? We all know women who have had abortions. I have not met a single one who preferred it instead of getting pregnant in the first place.

You can say for some abortion is a better alternative than giving birth. But only in Bizarro Colorado could you say it’s good.

State Rep. Brianna Titone had even more bizarro treatment for Polis, cutting him down to size saying, “He’s a man talking about abortion and has a hard time, like men do, talking about abortion.”

Fair point, Brianna. We men do have a hard time talking about abortion. You should know because you are biologically a man.

Brianna, as Colorado’s first elected transgender legislator, you will never ever – and I mean ever – personally face an unwanted pregnancy. So absolutely, beat up Polis for talking about abortion since he, like you, can never have one.

You go, girl!

But the bizarro hits just keep coming.

In response to being bludgeoned by his “progressive” allies, the ones he could never stand up to as governor, Polis’s office put out a statement that, “He is staunchly pro-choice”

Except he’s not. Even that’s Bizarro Colorado.

Our governor isn’t pro-choice. He is pro-abortion. What’s the difference? Well, not having a choice – that’s the difference.

Last session Polis signed a bill which outlawed the abortion reversal drug.

There is a two-dose pharmaceutical treatment to terminate a pregnancy over a couple of days. A biological woman takes the first pill but if she chooses to reverse the procedure (notice that “choice” word) she can take a reversal pill before taking this second abortion pill in hopes of canceling the abortion.

Though the law must go through some regulatory hurdles, Polis effectively took away a woman’s choice to reverse that abortion procedure, making him out-and-out pro-abortion and anti-choice.

So, in Bizarro Colorado it’s not religious Republican zealots up in a woman’s uterus: it’s progressive Democrats.

It’s all so, well… bizarre.

Jon Caldara is president of the Independence Institute in Denver and hosts “The Devil’s Advocate with Jon Caldara” on Colorado Public Television Channel 12. His column appears Sundays in Colorado Politics.

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