The American family is stressed out. 

United States Surgeon General Vivek Murthy recently issued a “surgeon general’s advisory” on the high levels of stress and mental health challenges facing today’s parents. He reports survey data showing 48% of all parents say on most days the stress they face is overwhelming.

Though one might say the Surgeon General is demonstrating his grasp of the obvious, his advisory is an important opportunity for reflection on what it says — and what it doesn’t. 

In an opinion piece, Murthy says the nation must “fundamentally shift how we view parenting, recognizing the work of raising children is crucial to the health and wellbeing of all society.” 

Spot on. 

Though his diagnoses are interesting, if incomplete, his prescriptions for progress focus on an ever-expanding menu of government programs, funded by a firehose of federal cash. 

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There are no magic programs that can heal a cultural crisis in American families that has been festering for decades. 

Murthy’s report importantly focuses on the heartbreaking fact many parents are isolated and lonely, going through ups and downs in isolation — a problem worsened when they view life through reality-distorting social media screens. 

Colorado-based pastor and author Rick Lawrence goes deeper than Murthy, touching on what he calls society’s flawed “target markers for success.” That includes a focus on “financial and career success as a substitute for God-given purpose” or being obsessed with kids getting admitted to elite schools, all to feel validation as good parents.

“The result,” Lawrence writes, “is that shame and guilt swirl around overworked, overwhelmed parents who never know if they’re doing a good job and are often isolated and disconnected from other parents.”

Theodore Roosevelt once said the following: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” 

One source of loneliness and isolation is the decline in participation in churches or other social organizations that can provide networks of support and encouragement. I have personally seen how the church I attend, BRAVE Church, comes alongside moms at their wits’ end giving them an in-person network of other parents on a similar journey, combined with spiritual grounding. 

A second family crisis that deserves the Surgeon General’s spotlight is that for decades, too many men have intentionally shirked or outright abandoned their duties as fathers, dumping the massive burden of raising children onto the backs of single mothers. This is a travesty that is far from a target solely of right-wing culture warriors. Democrats including former presidents Barack Obama and Bill Clinton — both plagued by problem fathers — have spoken about the serious problem of father absence. 

Single parents, usually moms, are warriors who juggle jobs, household duties, kids’ schooling, homework and activities, often with little time to themselves. Talk about stress.

Without question, in some cases, the men need to be out of the house for the safety of the mother and the children. But often these so-called men opt out of work, society and their duties that don’t end when they impregnate a woman.

Statistics and studies from the National Fatherhood Initiative (founded by my friend of many decades and cultural visionary Don Eberly), have chronicled the wide-ranging problems caused when fathers are absent from their children’s lives, including increased risks of poverty, incarceration, drug and alcohol abuse and dropping out of school.

Today, one in four children live in homes without the presence of a biological, adoptive or step father. And America, among 130 countries studied by the Pew Research Center, has the highest rate of children living in single-parent households. 

We need more people on the left, like Murthy, stressing what he calls the “sacred task” of raising children. In our timid times, this basic fact has been tiptoed around in the politically correct public square. It cannot be a solely conservative position to promote policies that elevate the importance of an intact family — including encouraging an active, present father.  

Only by aggressively and candidly addressing the root causes of stresses on American parents will we turn around the serious problems the surgeon general correctly diagnoses.

Sean Duffy, a former deputy chief of staff to Gov. Bill Owens, is a communications and media relations strategist and ghostwriter based in the Denver area.